The Best Thing You’re Not Jerking Off Too – Amy Sedaris



I know what you’re thinking.

Wait, actually I don’t and actually I don’t care. Cause it’s probably something like “Hey Come on respect the woman” or something like that.

amysedaris.jpg image by tim_monaghan

And this is all I have to say : Marge Simpson is in Playboy.

Ok? Get it? Your argument is moot. That means it’s invalid. And Amy Sedaris is fucking hot. Why? Cause she told us she is. That’s right, she didn’t pussy foot around it like these waify little chicks of Hollywood. She just went out an owned it.

Look let’s back track. You’re probably like “Wait, WTF does Marge Simpson appearing in the November issue of Playboy Magazine have to do with anything?!” Well let’s have a look:

Marge Simpson poses for the November issue of Playboy

Sure that’s great and all if you .. I don’t know, like yellow skin and don’t have access to real porn, or skinamax, or facebook.. or still have a myspace account…

But seriously it’s nothing we haven’t seen before. In fact the truth is, anyone with a curious eye an internet connection has probably stumbled upon Marge and the Other Simpsons doing much, much worse then posing naked. There’s tons upon tons of ‘Fan Friction’ (I’ll call it) penned from horny illustrator wanna be’s with ‘The Yellow Fever’ as it were. So what’s the big deal about Marge being in playboy?

“So in a way, you’d be stroking off to Matt Groening”

Well the truth is, this is Matt Groaning’s Marge – So in a way, you’d be stroking off to Matt Groening. Assuming that’s your interest in that particular magazine and said “article” within.

And Funny women or not, Marge is a culmination of almost entirely male brains. Hollywood, and the Simpsons is no excuse, is a Man’s world (more or less). So come on guys. If you really want to sensationalize a woman for her funny side, for being “real”, hell for being 3 dimensional – Amy Sedaris is the only option. (and yes Sarah Silverman is a damn good second chair.)

And I want you to realize, I’m not a super fan. I’m not going out of my way to listen to NPR just in hopes of hearing the awe inspiring quip’s and chaff’s of this acclaimed funny women.  But if she so happens to settle on in to an episode of Conan, I’ll now I’m in for a good ride. Which in a way, I wish was a favor I could return to the frolicking fairy of foolery.

Point being, as you settle in with your subscription to an 80 year old mans legacy (talking about Hugh Hefner here) and open up to the illustrated pictures of 55 year old man (that one’s Groening) just remember there are real women out there that are not only 3 Dimensional, they’re funny and intelligent.

7 Responses to “The Best Thing You’re Not Jerking Off Too – Amy Sedaris”

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  6. I rarely create comments, however i did some searching
    and wound up here The Best Thing Youre Not Jerking Off Too
    – Amy Sedaris | Podpocalypse. And I actually do have 2 questions for you if you don’t mind. Is it only me or does it appear like some of these remarks appear as if they are coming from brain dead individuals? 😛 And, if you are writing on other online sites, I would like to follow everything fresh you have to post. Could you list of all of all your shared pages like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?

  7. Wow, incredible blog layout! How lengthy have you ever been blogging for?

    you made blogging look easy. The overall glance of your website is wonderful, let alone the content!

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